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Player Ratings to the Theme of Rock Chalk Talk Inside Jokes

George Mason v Kansas Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images

Here at Rock Chalk Talk, most of the action takes place in the comment section. You get red hot food takes, political discussion, disagreements about music, and much, much more. If you stick around the site long enough, you start to see some trends and some inside jokes. Let’s rate them in accordance to how the players performed against George Mason, shall we?

5 Stars: Hawkeyes

Kansas plays the Iowa State Hawkeyes twice a year in basketball and once a year in football. You’d think the vast audience of this fine website would’ve figured some things out by now.

Jalen Coleman-Lands saved KU in this one. What a performance from the transfer from the Iowa State Hawkeyes. He canned five of seven from three and finished with 20 points.

4.5 Stars: The Rant

You guys all know what he lives for, right?

Mitch Lightfoot. The guy nailed everything from the floor (he went seven for seven) and made making baskets from deep in the post look easy, unlike another player that shall remain unnamed right now.

4 Stars: Mauling

Mauling mauls the four star rating. How does mauling maul something as inanimate as a rating? Mauling is as mauling does.

No one else was that great in this game.

3.5 Stars: XBOX Guy

There once was a guy who played XBOX Live with some Baylor football players and exonerated them on pending charges based on convos during the game. Solid work there, Sherlock.

Nope. No one here either.

3 Stars: Fizzle’s Terrible Food Takes

Name something delicious. Fizzle probably doesn’t like it or has some objection to it. He’s the Oasis of food takes: average at best, but the best in his mind.

I guess Christian Braun was the next best on Saturday. I just wanted him to exert himself more and maybe take a few of the seemingly endless array of open threes that he passed up.

Ochai Agbaji also gets a three. Ended with 11 points, but if you’re the man, you need to take over (or try to take over) a game like this.

Jalen Wilson got his first start of the campaign and didn’t really light it up. Finished with eight points and seven boards.

KJ Adams came in and provided a mini spark.

2 Stars: Lyme Disease

An oldie but a goodie that I had to get some info on because it was before my time. The CDC was apparently covering up Lyme disease research for some reason, according to a fan post. Now why would they do that? Not sure.

Not a great game from Dajuan Harris. Remy Martin is important I guess.

Speaking of guards, Joseph Yesufu had a golden opportunity to make an impression in this one and just didn’t. There were stretches out there (not just when Yesufu was on the court, mind you) that you just didn’t really know where any Kansas offense was going to come from.

1 Star: Coming to this site for the articles

Who does that? Smash that comment button and get to work.

David McCormack was bad. He only played ten minutes, but fumbled it out of bounds and missed shots from three feet away. Not his night.