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Player Ratings to the Theme of Rage

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Ragin’ Cajuns, get it?

Vegoose 2007 Day 2 Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images

Last night, I watched this game at a bar with no sound, so my perception of the game is probably quite slanted, but these ratings have never been scientific anyway so it doesn’t matter. Kansas played the Ragin’ Cajuns, and that equals a theme of rage today. Side note: I ordered a Cajun chicken sandwich at the bar right when KU started to pull away. Coincidence? Probably. Enjoy the ratings.

5 Stars: Rage Against the Machine

I can’t speak for everyone my age, but everyone I knew loved Rage Against the Machine. They were different from everyone, were one of the first to mix rap and rock, and had a true political message. I saw them a couple of times (once opening for U2!) and they were just as intense as you’d expect. The self titled and Evil Empire records are classics.

Lagerald Vick. This guy had himself quite a week. Against the Ragin’ Cajuns, Vick made seven of twelve from distance and finished with 33 points. One rebound shy of a double-double as well.

4 Stars: Rage the video game

I’ve never played it, but based on the reviews, people seem to like it. Good enough for me.

Udoka Azubuike. Weird. It seems that KU is much better with the big Nigerian on the court. Who would’ve thought? Dok finished with 17 points, eight rebounds, and four blocks.

Dedric Lawson. A much better performance from the Memphis transfer after a putrid performance against Vermont. Finished with a strong 19 points, but those five turnovers will prove costly against better competition. If he gets that under wraps, the old Dedric could be back.

3.5 Stars: Saying something is “All the rage”

Do the kids still say this? Probably not. Well, I’m old enough that this is still within my everyday lexicon, and I’m keeping it there, mister! Note: Get off my lawn.

David McCormack. Sure, the freshman only played ten minutes, but they were really important in keeping KU afloat and then surging in the first half. The ratings are pliable and David’s two points and six boards warrant the 3.5 star position. Note: Matt Tait went a little crazy on twitter with his praise and assessment of McCormack, no?

3 Stars: Rage Rooms

I just discovered that there are places that you can go and smash stuff to “get the anger out of your system.” The state of the world is such that I am not surprised at all that these exist. And better to take out your anger on a cinder block with a sledge hammer than in a way that hurts your fellow man.

Marcus Garrett. I’ve been a little harsh on Garrett in this feature, but this was a decent game from the sophomore. Took care of the ball for the most part and contributed five assists to go with his six points. Still, shooting jumpers is a thing he should let others do.

2.5 Stars: Rage Card Game

Marketed as a game of revenge, but as far as I am concerned (after an extremely brief google search as I’d never heard of this game before), this is a knockoff of UNO and is completely unnecessary.

Quintin Grimes, Charlie Moore, Devon Dotson, KJ Lawson. Add up all these players and divide by four and you have quite the average game.

2 Stars: Sports teams named Rage

This is mainly down to minor league and indoor football teams, but a simple google search of “Rage football” yielded me the Topeka Rage, Tri-City Rage, Calgary Rage, Orlando Rage, River City Rage, and Regina Rage on the first two pages. Those names are all dumb because all the names are Rage.

Mitch Lightfoot.The wrath of Bill Self was on old Mitch last night. That technical foul (which was impossible to discern in a loud bar with no sound) wasn’t the trigger, but perhaps the fact that it was a silly over the back foul was.

1 Star: Road Rage

Obviously a one-star pick and if I could go into the negative numbers here, I would. Road rage is terrifying and I hope no one reading this will ever perpetrate it on another human being or be the victim of this pointless and extremely dangerous act of terror.

No Kansas player was bad enough to be compared to road rage. Note: There never will be one.