Twas The Night Before RCTmas

I believe this is the 5th year I have done this. I am old. Enjoy and thanks to everyone for reading and commenting all year. You guys are the best.

Twas the night before RCTmas, and all through the blog

Not a creature was stirring, not even in the Phog.

The nets were all hung on their rims with care

In hopes that Azubuike soon would be there.

The players were all nestled at their beds,

While visions of a title danced in their heads.

And Josh Jackson in his cap, whoops that’s just his hair,

Was waiting for Christmas to be there.

When outside on Naismith there arose a clatter

I ran out to see what was the matter.

I peeked outside my window, opening my blinds

And looked outside, and what did I find?

It was a sleigh, pulled by eight reindeer

And out of nowhere did they appear.

And who do you think was on that sleigh, afloat?

It was me this year baby, with my big red coat.

I pulled out of my pack presents for all,

But first I introduced these players of basketball.

Down from they sleigh they came,

With me calling them by name:

"On Mason, on Graham, on Landen, on Svi!"

"On Vick, on Lightfoot, on Jackson, on Coleby!"

And so up onto Allen Fieldhouse they flew

With the sleigh full of our presents, and presents for others, too.

Into the Fieldhouse they roared

And out of the pack, the presents poured.

I gathered them up, and unveiled them one by one

Ensuring our RCTmas would be tons of fun.

Udoka Azubuike had just come in our midst.

So I offered him a new working wrist.

For KU football, a bit of a different flavor,

How about a freaking offensive coordinator.

I gave health to Landen Lucas, our best rim protector,

And to Jayhawk nation, a new athletic director.

The volleyball team won’t be left out, that would be a pity.

They get a time machine and a brand new selection committee.

One more thing for Beaty, since he was a bit confused.

A book on 4th down math; last year’s went unused.

I looked to the donors, who gave me a wink,

And decided we needed a D1 hockey rink.

Lastly, you know this joke doesn’t get old,

I said a prayer for no 3-point fools gold.

I then told the commentators thanks for being pals,

And added hey let’s figure out the Panama Canal.

With that all taken care of, I rose out of sight

And yelled Merry RCTmas to all, and to all a good night.