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A dramatic reading of the infamous Kansas State basketball rant

"The Rant," as read by David.

Last year, a simple Q&A with sister site Bring on the Cats led to something now known in RCT lore simply as "The Rant." The Rant took place at BOTC, but was leveled against the RCT commenters for disagreeing with some statements made by the BOTC author during the preview. If you aren't into clicking links, the author essentially goes on an obscenity-laced tirade directed at the commenters who disagreed with his appraisal of the talent level on K-State's roster. The Rant has been referenced repeatedly since that fateful day, and has at this point attained legendary status here at Rock Chalk Talk.

In honor of rivalry-ish week, since we clearly don't have an interesting game to talk about, I thought it appropriate to immortalize The Rant by paying tribute in the form of a dramatic reading, set to music. Without further ado, I present to you "The Rant," as read by David. Click below to listen (right click to open in a new window/tab if you want to read along).

WARNING: NSFW (Language)

The Rant

Here's the script, so you can read along:

This really pisses me off. This is why I fucking HATE the University of Kansas.

It’s one thing to question what I have to say, but to ridicule what I had to say by trashing everything I’ve invested my time in…fuck ’em.

I do this for fucking free. In my spare time. On top of 50-60hrs a week of work as one of the owners of my engineering firm, and in the process of moving as well. Why? Because I love K-State, and I love basketball. I ripped the skin off my fingers dunking during lunch pick-up today; taped it up and went back in. Half my t-shirt wardrobe is K-State basketball t-shirts. All but one of my ball shorts are K-State shorts. I live this shit, man.

Someone asks questions about the basketball team, and I answer them. If I’m asked to speculate, I’ll speculate. I feel I’ve earned the right to do so. It might not seem like a lot of effort on the surface, but it’s 2-3 articles per game. Twice a week. And I try not to fly by the seat of my pants, and I try to offer an insight that is reasonably informed, which means there’s a couple hours of research into each preview, and the commitment to watch every single minute of every single game. Got friends going skiing today? Nope, can’t go. Gotta see the game. Want to spend time with your family? Only if they want to watch K-State get beat by 27 by TC-fucking-U. What’s happened by spending this much time invested in the team is that I have a better knowledge of this basketball team short of people that specifically get paid to do what I do.

But for someone that doesn’t know what they’re talking about talk shit on what I have to say when I’m asked to posite hypothetically on the future, and not have the fucking sack to say it to my face, to not give me a chance to explain…that’s just being a bunch of egotistical assholes. It’s arrogance in its purest form.

This season has been extremely taxing on me. Do you have ANY idea how hard it is to write about a team that just purely doesn’t give a fuck on any level? You can’t. You repeat yourself over and over. "Well, if we’d come to play, we could win." That’s the preview for every single fucking game this year. It’s annoying as fuck. As for recaps? "Well, we looked like we could play with them, but just didn’t have our shit together." Every. Single. Game.

And to have someone that can at least ask some questions without being deliberately condescending, then have those answers I give turned and beat up like a couple of drunk frat guys bullying a geek…that’s just below the belt.

I live this shit, man.