Monday afternoon hope arrived packaged neatly in the form of an email from a "sales consultant" who claims One Legends Way in Arlington Texas as his workplace. In case you are wondering what happens to be on Legends Way, it's the Cowboys Stadium. The Cowboys Stadium owned by one Jerry Jones and the Cowboys Stadium playing host to the Big 12 football championship in about a month or so.
So what could Jerry Jones have said to me to make me feel the utmost confidence in our current situation? Let's just say if kool aid had a substance abuse group, Jerry Jones and the Cowboys might just be the president...and a client.
About 4:30pm I get home, check my email and what do I find. An email addressed to the entire Rock Chalk Talk staff. Rather than spoil the fun, I'll simply let you read it yourself. I've left the name and contact information of Jerry Jones hired goon out in order to protect the innocent.
I am reaching out to Rock Chalk Talk in regards to the Big 12 Championship to be hosted at Cowboys Stadium on 12/4/10. In the event KU is in the game, I have attached some brief information that could be of great use to Jayhawk fans across the country.
We still have great locations available, and I would be the first point of contact in regards to securing a rental suite.
Please feel free to contact me at anytime with questions.
One Legends Way | Arlington, TX 76011
Yes folks, you read it hear first. We're not out of this YET!! And for only $12-25,000 we can secure ourselves a suite. Somebody call up KUGrad and pull him out of retirement. Give him the old "was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor" speech if you have to, we've got a Big 12 Title to win!
Jerry Jones has convinced himself that his own Cowboys are still in the mix and in doing so he also appears sold on another floundering team in our own Jayhawks. Now sure it would be easy to assume that this email was targeted at any and all websites associated with a Big 12 team, but that would just be to obvious and most certainly isn't the case.
It's obvious to me that Jerry Jones BELIEVES the Jayhawks can still win out and represent the Big 12 North in the title game paving the way for a BCS appearance with a .500 record...who's with me!!!
Hear me out. Kansas wins out defeating Colorado, Oklahoma State, Nebraska and Missouri. That's a 4-4 record folks. That's six wins and bowl eligibility.
Now Kansas will need some help, but if Jerry Jones believes, why shouldn't we? First we have the Corn. Nebraska will need to beat Iowa State and then lose three straight to Kansas, A&M and Colorado. Seems perfectly reasonable right?
Second, the Tigers. Missouri needs to beat Iowa State and lose out including the Border War. Again, if Jerry Jones believes, then I'm sold as fast as Jimmy Johnson buying hair product in a wind storm.
Next up, the Cyclones of Iowa State. By jerrylogic (verified term similar to George Bush's "stategery") this is actually the biggest potential stumbling block for Kansas. Plain and simple the Clones can't win again.
The last obstacle, Kansas State. The Wildcats have to get a win against Missouri and then lose out.
If all five of these scenario's extremely LIKELY scenario's unfold, Kansas will be the Big 12 North representative in the championship game in Dallas. This is obviously why Jerry Jones has enlisted one of his goons to talk me and the rest of the RCT staff into buying a luxury suite.
Now if I was crazy, I'd pass on this golden opportunity. But since I'm a reasonable person and I can clearly see that this is a very likely scenario, I'm going to go ahead and secure my luxury accommodations and book my trip to Dallas. You are all welcome to join me for a small but worthwhile fee.
Need more incentive? Well guess what I've got it. With every suite purchased you also receive 5 parking passes and $1,500 in food/beverage credit for the group. With that sizable credit we will be able to afford to split two large pizza's in Cowboy Stadium from what I hear.
Now if you can't feel the sarcasm in this yet, you're missing more screws than Jessica Simpson. But sometimes the best thing you can do is laugh. And when this email came across last night, I couldn't help but get a good chuckle out of the whole deal.
Thank you Jerry Jones, thank you Tony Romo, thank you America and thank you to the Dallas Cowboys Sales Consultant that will remain nameless. You made my night.