In honor of the final Breaking Bad episode next Sunday, I will try and awkwardly shoehorn a BB reference into each team ranking.
1. Land Crab - As the only undefeated team left, it is pretty clear who the one that knocks in our league is.
2. Papa Wheelie's Boys - While PWB is ranked high, they could have been easily beat this week. Another week like this one and The Wheat Farmers might be dinging their bell next week.
3. Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks - Despite losing this week by a box cutter's thin margin, they are still ranked 3. Cuts and benchings should be in order to shake this off.
4. Rock Chalk Tupac - RCT won on the back of Drew Brees this week. 4 TD's for 38 points always makes the difference 96% purity and 72% with food coloring.
5. The Anti-Dentites - after a slow start the Dentites are coming back with a vengeance, bitch.
6. Sharknadoes - They probably could of won if not for Bowe, Hilton, and Dawson. Maybe they need to stock up on minerals.
7. Fighting 5.7's - the 5.7's blew the doors off the cow house with a narrow victory over the JayShox. Cam Newton is putting up good numbers but the rest of the team needs to pull in better numbers if they want to go higher in the rankings.
8. Denver Fax Machines - Its hard not to root for AP. I was bummed when he came within a couple yards of the record last year and it looks like he will fall well short this year. Regardless, that still good enough numbers for a week 3 win. Although, we aren't done until AP says we're done.
9. The JayShox - I don't do this often but seeing you are a KU fan, I'll cut you some slack. Its definitely time to slip some Ricin to the players scoring you 0 points and see what you can do on the waivers.
10. Glengarry Glenn Dorsey - Kaepernick has to be due for a good game soon. Might have to throw the pizza on the roof and bench him though.
11. The Wheat Farmers - Did Foster speaking up about payments at Tennessee lead to a shitty game? That's what the kids call 'epic fail.'
12. The Pinky's - CJ Spiller might be trying to stab you with a broken piece of plate.
13. Hip Hops Team - The owner may or may not be still playing. Some tough love, if you are starting two injured players, you suck at fantasy. Period.
14. Dante's Afro - Still winless. We might have to send Dante's Afro to Belize
Fantasy Player of the Week - Drew Brees. 38.2 points
Fantasy Owner of the Week - Papa Wheelie's Boys. 96%
Fantasy Owner of the Weak - Glengarry Glenn Dorsey. 74%