One more week to go. Some teams have clinched playoff spots. A couple are still up for grabs. But let's forget about the playoffs. Nobody really cares who wins this league, right? What does the winner get, anyway? Nothing? That's what I thought. (Edit: Apparently the winner gets a $40 Amazon gift card.)
But let's talk about what is on everyone's mind.
What is still in doubt is this; who will the last place team be? There are still five teams who have a chance at claiming the dreaded "bottom of the barrel." If your team is not one of The Jayshox, The Wheat Farmers, Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks, Dante's Afro, or Papa Wheelie's Boys, then you are absolutely, 100% safe.
Clinched playoff berth (4 teams): Glengarry Glenn Dorsey, Land Crab, The Anti-Dentites, Fighting 5.7s.
In the playoff hunt (5 teams): Sharknadoes, Denver Fax Machines, Hip Hops Team, Rock Chalk Tupac, The Pinkys.
Most of the year, I've been going by "Points For" as the tiebreaker for teams with an equal record. Last week and again this week, I'll use the "Rank" as determined by FleaFlicker. You can find this on the league home page under Standings. I'm not sure how FleaFlicker determines rank, but hopefully it considers head to head matchups.
The Cream of the Crop: Glengarry Glenn Dorsey
The Bottom of the Barrel: Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks
As for how we will determine the "Bottom of the Barrel" and the winner of RCT's newest dancing .GIF next week, I'm opening that up for debate in the comments section. Head to head? Points for? Rank as determined by FleaFlicker? Make your thoughts known.
No special guests this week. No
fake quotes. Nothing funny or clever. "Just the facts, ma'am." Let's begin.
(Last week's rankings in parentheses.)
1 (1). Glengarry Glenn Dorsey (9-3) - Clinched playoff spot
GGD has been unstoppable since Week 5. They rank #1 in points for. They rank #3 in points against. That, my friends, is a winning combination. The own a head to head tiebreaker over Land Crab for first place overall.
This week: @ Sharknadoes (6-6)
A win clinches the #1 overall seed in the playoffs. A loss obviously puts that up for grabs.
2 (2). Land Crab (9-3) - Clinched playoff spot
Land Crab ranks #3 in points for. They only rank #10 in points against. LC must be catching teams at the right time, though, as they are a solid #2 after spending most of the year at #1. I'm really pretty surprised at this team - it seems to me like it's Peyton Manning and everyone else. Brandon Marshall is pretty good I guess. Wes Welker isn't a slouch. But this isn't a PPR league (is it?).
This week: @ The Wheat Farmers (4-8)
The Anti-Dentites learned the hard way to not take the Farmers lightly. This will be the Farmer's bowl game, so expect Land Crab to walk into a hostile environment. A win and a GGD loss clinches the #1 overall seed in the playoffs.
3 (3). Fighting 5.7s (8-4) - Clinched playoff spot
Fighting has clinched the Division 2 crown already, holding a two game lead with only one game left. Somehow, Fighting ranks #11 in points for. However, they are #1 in points against. Does defense win fantasy championships? I guess we'll find out.
This week: vs Denver Fax Machines (6-6)
A win coupled with a GGD loss AND a Land Crab loss would put the #1 overall seed in the playoffs within reach for Fighting. It would depend on how FleaFlicker handled the tiebreakers. With the top two teams on the road, maybe there's a chance.
4 (4). The Anti-Dentites (7-5) - Clinched playoff spot
The Dentites rank #4 in points for and #4 in points against. That should be a formula for a better record than 7-5. When his opponent breaks 100 points, fizzle's Dentites are 0-4. There's your key to knocking these guys off.
This week: vs The Jayshox (4-8)
The Dentites overlooked the Wheat Farmers two weeks ago and ran into the GGD train last week. Can they right the ship against a better-than-their-record-indicates Jayshox? The Dentites need the Redskin duo of Alfred Morris and Robert Griffin to really work it this week. A win doesn't help much and a loss doesn't hurt much this week.
5 (6). The Denver Fax Machines (6-6) - in the hunt for a playoff spot
DFM is #2 in points for. However, they are #13 in points allowed. Hence the .500 record. Still, this is a dangerous team that could make noise in the playoffs should they clinch a spot, despite the best efforts of Coby Fleener.
This week: @ Fighting 5.7s (8-4)
I feel confident in saying "win and you're in." But there are three other 6-6 teams in the same division as DFM. A loss means they have to hope all of the other 6-6 teams lose as well. So, knock off Fighting, score lots of points, and hope that FleaFlicker blesses you with its tiebreaker system.
6 (7). Hip Hops Team (6-6) - in the hunt for a playoff spot
HHT is ranked #13 in points for, one of just two teams that have yet to break 1100 points on the year. However, they are ranked #6 in points against. This formula somehow equals a .500 ballclub. I must have skipped the day they covered that in my stats class.
This week: vs Papa Wheelie's Boys (5-7)
Definitely need a win to make the playoffs. Need to hope for a DFM loss and preferably a Tupac and Pinky loss as well. A loss for HHT probably knocks them out of the playoffs.
7 (9). Rock Chalk Tupac (6-6) - in the hunt for a playoff spot
Tupac is ranked #5 in points for. They are ranked #7 in points against. Average rankings for an average team with an average record. I was on board with the "Drew Brees revenge tour" but apparently Steven Jackson wasn't. Ditto Anquan Boldin.
This week: vs Dante's Afro
Just like the two teams above them, Tupac needs a win and to root for the other 6-6 teams to lose. Otherwise it comes down to tiebreakers. Afro has been regarded by most of our guests as the weakest team in the league. A letdown here for Tupac would be devastating.
8 (5). The Pinkys (6-6) - in the hunt for a playoff spot
The Pinkys are ranked #10 in points for. They rank #8 in points allowed. Somehow, they still have a shot at the playoffs despite being in the bottom half of the league in both rankings.
This week: vs Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks (4-8)
Pinkys definitely has to win to have a shot, and will need help from the other 6-6 teams (as in, they all need to lose). Can Pinkys handle an MSMS team desperate to get out of the bottom of the league?
9 (8). Sharknadoes (6-6) - in the hunt for a playoff spot
The Sharks rank #8 in points for. They rank #5 in points against. This is a decent roster that rarely put it all together in any given week. Such is the curse of those who snipe my QB one pick before me in the draft.
This week: vs Glengarry Glenn Dorsey (9-3)
Good luck this week vs the hottest team in the league. Sharks need a lot of help to make the playoffs, and a win this week would obviously be huge. But I think they'll also need DFM, Pinkys, Hip Hop, and Tupac to all lose. That's quite the parlay if you're in Vegas this week.
10 (12). Papa Wheelie's Boys (5-7) - out of playoff contention
PWB spent a lot of time ranked in the top half of the league this year. Alas, going 1-4 in your last five games will bring you down. The Aaron Rodgers injury really put these guys behind the 8-ball. PWB still ranks #6 in points scored, but #11 in points against.
This week: @ Hip Hops Team (6-6)
A win will ensure that PWB will have no claim to the bottom of the barrel. However, there is still a chance. A loss combined with a win by all of the teams below them, and there's a chance. So... PWB. Just win, baby. That way you don't have to sweat anything.
11 (10). The Wheat Farmers (4-8) - out of playoff contention
Ah, my favorite team. #7 in points for. Not bad. Not bad. #14 in points against. In other word, dead last. And, really, it's not even close, and hasn't been for several weeks. In fact, the gap keeps growing. The next closest team in points against is 66.25 behind TWF. I hate fantasy football. There's a good chance that next year I'll be with Warden watching from the stands.
This week: vs Land Crab (9-3)
Oh, of course. Needing a win to stay out of the cellar, and I play the #2 team in the league. The one with Peyton Manning, who is playing the suddenly porous Kansas City Chiefs defense. I hate fantasy football. FML!
Anyway, a win coupled with a loss from any of Dante's Afro, The Jayshox, or MSMS, and The Wheat Farmers can breathe (and not dance). A loss and... well... I don't want to think about that.
12 (11). Dante's Afro (4-8) - out of playoff contention
#14 in points for. #9 in points against. This is the other team that has yet to break 1100 points on the year, and their record shows it. The roster isn't terrible, but with Tom Brady having a terrible year statistically, that has led to most guests to RCT Fantasy Football Weekly labeling DA as one of the weakest teams in the league.
This week: @ Rock Chalk Tupac (6-6)
Obviously, a win is huge. Same deal as the Wheat Farmers. In fact, all four of these 4-8 teams are in the same boat. Win and hope at least one of the others lose.
13 (13). The Jayshox (4-8) - out of playoff contention
#9 in points for. #2 in points against. Yeah, you saw that correctly. Not a terrible roster by any means, but too many weeks of scoring fewer than 90 points (five).
This week: @ The Anti-Dentites (7-5)
I'll say it again... win and hope the other 4-8 teams lose. Lose and... well... hopefully you've been practicing your moves.
14 (14). Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks (4-8) - out of playoff contention
#12 in points for. #12 in points against. Currently on a six game losing streak. EJ Manuel starting at QB. Ray Rice and CJ Spiller at HB - two of the biggest draft busts this year. Lots of bad luck karma currently surrounding this team. Can they break it in one final game of glory?
This week: @ The Pinkys (6-6)
One last time - win and hope the others lose. Lose and clinch the bottom of the barrel.
Who will go dancing? Vote in our poll.
Going Streaking: Glengarry Glenn Dorsey, eight wins in a row
Going Sliding: Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks, six losses in a row
Fantasy Player of the Week: Philip Rivers, 36.7 points
Honorable Mention: Josh Gordon, 32.7 points
Fantasy Owner of the week: Mantis Shrimp Murder Sticks, 100% (in a loss by less than two points to Land Crab)
Fantasy Owner of the weak: Tie, 69%, Fighting 5.7s and The Pinkys